Well I’ll Go To The Foot Of My Stairs…

In contemplation of loss.

March 1, 2008 · 22 Comments

For Ray:

For Susie:

Two 0f the most significant people in my entire life gone within 4 days of one another. Please bear with me while I grieve. I am in a totally poo place right now but friends always kinda put you back on track, don’t they? Ray’s exit song says it all…

I love them both. I’ve lost them both.. Truth be known, I’m a bit lost without them both. The two people in this fucked up world who accepted me as the oddball that I am. The two people who undertood me, understood who I am. Didn’t agree with me, necessarily, but understood me. And they never judged me and they always loved me anyway.

I refuse to grow old without my friends.

Someone said to me recently, in amongst all this loss I’m experiencing, they said “this is hell - there’s no way out of here but better”. I don’t know that I agree. We only get one go at ‘life’ - it isn’t a rehearsal. Life, ultimately, isn’t something that we’re ‘paving the way’ for others - we’re doing it for ourselves. We might make a difference. We might not. All that we can try for is to ensure that others experience the love, respect, dignity and humanity that we have. And that means treating others with love, respect, dignity and humanity…..but then, you know that dont you.

Loss sucks.

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